The written Chronicles

Has been a long time since I blogged I know.

 Got my O level results, not happy or sad either. Few days after that, I lost my interest in poly (interior design) so I decided to go to apply for MI since 3 years is more relaxed than 2 years. Haha.

 Don’t really like the fact how parents treat me nowadays. Talking to them is like reading up quantum physics on a unicycle while bouncing a basketball. I really hate the way how my parents really misjudge me as someone who is very immature and rebelious. When I try to reason things out, they perceive it as an argument – even when I talk to them nicely man. Its not nice you know, having to talk nicely to them and in return, I get some tongue-lashing. That is very just of them. My father don’t really listen to me when I talk -he will appear to be seemingly listening but his mind is somewhere in the universe. And when I get very irritated that I have to repeat things more than twice – he perceive me as being rude. My mother will never let me talk and finished my sentence and always wants me to listen to her saying things that I  already know a long time ago. And their arguments targeting are based on biased sources that are very not reliable.

 One will always feel VERY violated when someone is called by banging the door or being screamed at everyday. One will never fail to feel very angered by such acts. One will always have to deal with his barbaric behavior and keep his emotions inside. Why do I have to be that one. Sometimes its best to not care at all. Seriously, again feeling good that I can still try to reason out politely even when I’m full of angst. They are pushing my limits unknowingly. I don’t have the right to voice out either. I know this is very negative but I think God hates me, and this is so clearly evident to the many unneccessary and useless problems I have to face in life

As mentioned.

 Really, I’m no superman. It seems like the world is making me UTTERLY pissed. The work is killling me, have to deal with everything there – including a very fussy person WHOM I will not mention, my family is no better – had to deal with my father’s impatience and self-centred behavior (can stop banging the door or not?) and brother’s barbaric behavior. The train got stucked for a long period of time back home. STILL, I tired to put on a nice mood but I’ve talked to John on msn and he was ridiculously rude. Something else gone wrong too – the internet’s slow. Oh yeah, the O levels is coming this thursday. Looks like my father really didn’t profit from what he learnt.

I haven’t flared up yet if you seen me doing one next time, you know what happened. Though in my brimming anger, I am still trying to be nice in my heart and let the chaos run around me and I remain peaceful inside.

And the person who contacted me for joining SSW last month seems to be making my life harder.

 I know I am angry yet I made an acheivement that I think not many (i know) are able to do – to think very very sensibly even in the worst of moods. I don’t care if you all think that I’m boasting. That BS. I think this is an accomplishment.

You will find out about that later.

 Had a nice meeting for SSW in the morning and there is hope and something to look forward to (masterclasses, exchanges) if circumstances permits. I really am keen to play a solowork BUT NOT FOR CONCERT. As in, I only wanna try with the band. I guess that won’t happen. I have to improve all my techniques first.

 Went to Banquet and had some food before I went to work. Verin and I were at the counter during the last hours.  Silly I tell you – the customers are trying to play hide-and-seek, and we are supposed to find them (for their indecisiveness and last minute changes). 2 customers really complained – either they don’t know that these were yoghurts (and not solid ice-cream. blame their stupidity/literacy) or we are really really lousy. One silly Ah pek gave me a pissed off look. Kinda typical (ah pek) singaporean – get impatient soooo easily. Served Gar Hong some juice, HAHA!

On the mrt, one 5 year old girl  and her big sister were playing near the pole – their laughter is funny and made me smile for the day. A very good end to my day. And i had to alight at Yishun for the next train again. IT ALWAYS HAPPENS – my destination is always at semb. yet they force us to alight at yishun. Mrt hates me. =(

I guess in life (not only the FnB part-time service) that………….the people around me are a little ungrateful. Thats life – kindness sometimes do not begets kindness. I think someone is hinting me that I’m not a likable person. I guess I should stay being myself and not me changing to suit them (and then they step my head -.-) Where are the seeds of maturity when I needed them most?

Tired. I want to sleee..ZZzzz

Well I can’t help much since I’m only one person.
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and this is non-advertorial
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I know it needs “global warning“ but how can it be with the human race being so superficial, ignorant, and nonchalent.

You know what, all O level students out there – forget about the results
All students can just forget about the exams and paper cert and building of self-reputation and shit.
It will all be meaningless because we are going to die in 20/30 years.

(I know – what has came over me. WRONG. What hasn’t put you in realisation that Global Warming is Real. Real. Real. I’ve learnt we could be the last batch of the human race because if Scientist said centuries they mean 100 years which we still do not know if we could survive that long. DECADES. We can live that long if Global Warming is going away. Face it WE are going to die. Not our sons/grandsons)

Take some time to think how meaningless your papercerts are if you are not going to live – like say…longer than 2012?

 You’ve seen it. Remember : According to James Hansen, the TOP CLIMATE SCIENTIST at NASA: We have passed tipping points. We haven’t passed a point of no return. We can roll things back, but it is going to require a quick change in direction.

Still complacent I presume?

I mean whats the point of living when we know we are not going to live. Well, you might rebuke me by saying its all a lie, they always say that, nothing new. What if i say, it is not a lie, but the lie is for us to be self-comforted and also in denial? I feel the human race really failed itself due to sheer stupidity (I’m one of them). In the past, there were mentality (still exist) that we can’t stop progress -deforestation, reduce taxation etc…. It somehow generate into a norm which all of us  has that mentality that is nothing wrong with it. Bullshit. Where was I?

 The human race has failed itself:

For being a supreme specie in the planet yet men are selfish and insensitive to the planet.
The most destructive specie in the world.
The most divided specie in the world – politically, culturally etc.
Having fully-functional brains but being very very useless and unhelpful….and LAZY
Knowing what is the right thing but does the opposite anyway.
When you are indifferent after reading this blog post.

I know I am only one insignificant person in the world – having no status, reputation and influence on others. I have no inner desires to garner more visitors to my blog (what can i gain by that? -.-) . If you still insist that you are not going to die because G.W. isn’t happening, and/or its effects aren’t abrupt. Go watch that bloody video again and watch this too – if you are firm that it isn’t going to happen. Not that I can impose my views or anything. Im just 16 man…….

End of the day: How much have you done for your planet in return? The planet provided you the shelter, food and etc. What have YOU done in return?

It is a nice feeling at times. Its not a nice feeling at times. It gives me comfort. It gives me displeasure. It makes me feel home. It makes me feel alienated.

Go figure.

 After finishing Megaman today, I really felt I was about 8 or 9 years old. I could have sworn that I really feel like I was living in Yishun before I moved to Sembawang. I felt that I want to revert to the past where I feel the food my mother cooks taste more, my both parents look younger, my mother would wait for me outside the school gate every wednesday to bring me out to eat (yep, i still remember, Causeway Point was the nicest place to eat that time), my mother and I would be playing those ticketed machines from time zone.

I was afraid of the dark. I remembered watching wheel of fortune, the 8 immortals, phua chu kang. I would have to go to tuition every wed and madrasah every tues and thurs. I really felt I should have cherised those times. It was really a carefree moment (now, I can remember what it really meant by life in a bliss). No worries in studies and I remember that 1999 was a year that had many rainy spells and I loved it. I still can remember why 1999, 2002, and 2005 were good years. 2005 was a period of time where I started to have alot of thoughts coming to mind – and It was a rocky year. Jimmy Eat world songs are making me remember stuff in 2004. The songs back then were nicer than those that I hear nowadays – those meaningless loud music with lyrics making no sense without a theme revolving arond it.

1999  – A year with good grades and good friends to talk to. Thats kids – we weren’t corrupted by the outside world. No judgemental friends gossip around so much. Our craze back then was pokemon and cards.  I really love it because in class, we would have those grouping system and we will get hyped about getting points (Heh, I still can remember that one kid – Paolo, I think, was angry when one of his friends did something stupid and got their points deducted, and he said the F word.) We watched Lion King on the Class TV back then. Most PE classes were done during the cold mornings and abacus were very tedious. Back then I was like – Why do we need to know the abacus when there is a calculator?

 2002 – I can remember this well. We were excited about the SYF (in choir back then) and I was super prepared, like drinking honey, keeping my voice well, singing in tune (back then, the mindset was sing high think low, sing low think high) Back then, I really had a good best buddy. Then I realised that that was the only year I had a best friend. We go through tons of things together. Yeah then separate ways. In 2002 I can remember good songs, good movies – that time, Jimmy Neutron was a good movie and see Spot Run was one too! That year was the time I played so much CS and TFC. The Sims was a pretty good game too. The form teacher was my favourite form teacher in my whole life. I felt she taught us lots of things and she was the friendliest form teacher in my primary school life man. She protected me from bullies LOL. Good grades and the topics taught that year was awesome!

2005 – That year wasn’t a good year because many things happened that year. It was just memorable thats all. I was a loner – I admitted it. For some reason, I can isolate myself from the rest of the world and let myself enjoy at the beauty of the world when it was raining, pouring, windy. SYF that year was memorable because we’ve been through some exchanges and we got our first SYF award -bronze, but a good start. Band camp was very fun too. I felt the band just….disintegrated after that year.  NDP MOTIVATORS was a good CIP program. Faiz would spent some time in my house doing some shitty webpage for the band. I had a meaningful friendship with some friends especially Farah. Spent almost everyday talking to her. Again, went separate ways. 2005 revolved around Eagle Bend (a very nice symphonic band song at that time) and Jimmy Eat world songs.

I predict 2008 would be a good year. 1999, 2002, 2005. All were 3 year intervals!

I hate it – Not able to attend Friday prayers because I felt it is THURSDAY. I’m not jetlagged and have no reason to but how can I thought today is Thursday? It really felt like Thursday. Damn. And not attending that obliged prayer felt like shit – not the first or second time I had been doing it.  Argh.

I need to find a job for me to do. Damn.

Ok, let see.

Im currently doing unhealthy stuffs

-Playing games(Megaman Legends) for more than 12 hours straight
-Watching so much TV I haven’t watched  these holidays
-Not working

Face it – I don’t have a life. I also don’t have the urgency to do things because (I think by nature O level students will not have the urgency to do anything these holidays buuut) I am not working. Need to find a job. You know I’m still procrastinating nowadays even after reading the self-improvement on procrastination and haven’t reading it regularly – which I should (Heh, no pun intended) I gueeeesss,  self-discipline IS self-discipline.

Downloading Adobe FW (Fireworks) free trial and I haven’t been doing  image editing for ages! And I was very good at those. Go visit CSS band website and check out the blog banner and poster for orientation (Jan 2007) – yes, that good. I’m always good at improvising, thats why I’m lazy to download brushes. Heh.  Going to do up my blog banner, soon.

 Alvin and the Chipmunks
Review by Muhd Fikri

Rating:2/5 (Not good, Not bad) – Watched the original cartoons…long time ago.(could have been a fan if they showed more in cable)…and I can still be satisfied with the elements in this movie – utter chaos. But the plot is juuust as mundane, wasted the shitload of time and money. Yes, the Chipmunks are cute but I can say that THE PRODUCTION SHOULD HAVE BEEN MORE CREATIVE AND ORIGINAL. Not like the sucky Madagascar story that I’ve watch. I can say Pixar Animations are classics. Back to the chipmunks, not enough verbal irony, predictable ending, no element of surprise = recipe for a time-wasting movie. What is the theme anyway? Enjoyed the movie 60% though. Should have been a better movie. If it has sequels in future, erm…don’t go…regret la. I laugh at bad movies in the face.

Oh yeah about Bee Movie – ‘Cars’ is better. Bee movie makes me appreciate the visual beauty of the production and the substance in ‘Cars’. I love the fact the producers from those…movie are adding more spoofs to their movie. Dreamworks production is nice – WOHOOO more upcoming Movies(Narnia) on C.S Lewis books!! and Waterhorse seems nice. Love those Fantasy, and Comedy. Just realised (general sense) people who don’t take lit may not know how to appreciate the humor in films – not the slapstick humor.

Watched some documentary  and I learnt that something of a huge success comes in great planning, and the movie is about Mr. Bean  and Rowan Atkinson. Those scenes that we watch in Mr.Bean, I was amazed how every small single thing was planned out intricately. Makes me appreciate the simplicity of the film and humour is the universal language. No wonder it is a success worldwide.

Thought about somethings in future on the way to the cinema. I really feel Singapore is going to take a huge plunge downwards – a degeneration of what our forefathers has built up. I mean look at our generation : lacking in maturity, manners, low threshold of tolerance, impatience – and our generation is the one leading Singapore???

Really it is the foreshadowing of……..the end of the world!!!!!!!!!

I’m hungry..